I haven't written abut a meltdown here in a while, mostly because they haven't happened much of late. My streak came to an end this weekend. I was visiting Connecticut, land of fall leaves, cool climes, beautiful local apples, and a fabled vegan breakfast house. Vegan, you say? Yes vegan, they don't eat eggs or dairy so maybe I could have breakfast. Take a moment to think about what you might order in a breakfast place if you can't eat eggs, dairy or yeast. No really, give it a shot. If you're thinking of anything other than a delicious breakfast meat product, I likely can't have it. Even hashbrowns are cooked in butter for that crispy outside I love so much. Needless to say, I haven't eaten breakfast in 2 months. That's torture for a breakfast lover!!
So, here we are at the vegan breakfast hut (not its real name). I'm pumped. Pancakes with local apples, soysage, and home fries please... and throw in a piece of that "chocolate devastation cake". Heaven!! Except not. The pancakes are sourdough, that means they have a yeast starter. The soysage has "nutritional yeast" as an ingredient. And that delicious cake? Also sourdough. That means I'm left with a breakfast of home fries.
The tears spring forth unbidden. I find myself unable to from an actual sentence. I have to retreat to the bathroom to attempt some form of regrouping. Except I can't stop crying. Had it been up to me, I would have left. Just cut my losses and have another protein shake breakfast, but I was not alone and I would not deny another the joy of pancakes with local apples. So I sat at a table and ate potatoes and cried all through breakfast. This is incredibly difficult for me. I like to be tough, in control of my emotion. I like to be unbreakable, and now yeast has broken me.
Apparently we aren't out of the woods where the food meltdown is concerned.
Monday, November 1, 2010
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Food is just not that interesting.
If you know me well at all, that statement is blasphemy! In my family, we do food. My dad relates stories of his travels by places he eats. It is a longstanding tradition to have pictures of each feast we assemble for. I LOVE food.
The problem is, I'm allergic to everything I love. I love pizza, and cheese, and pie, and sandwiches, and good bread, and brownies, and a whole slew of other stuff I just can't eat. It's somewhat depressing really. So I tend to eat the same safe stuff that is decent, but overall bland, and it's boring. Food I'm not allergic to, just isn't fun.
This means I'm going to have to shake off the cobwebs and get creative. I'm going to have to make food I can eat interesting. I have a great new vegan cookbook that has lots of good breakfast recipes. The one for sweet potato pancakes has me interested so I might start there. I just know I have to do something different. So stay tuned for updates. I will definitely repost recipes that are great!
The problem is, I'm allergic to everything I love. I love pizza, and cheese, and pie, and sandwiches, and good bread, and brownies, and a whole slew of other stuff I just can't eat. It's somewhat depressing really. So I tend to eat the same safe stuff that is decent, but overall bland, and it's boring. Food I'm not allergic to, just isn't fun.
This means I'm going to have to shake off the cobwebs and get creative. I'm going to have to make food I can eat interesting. I have a great new vegan cookbook that has lots of good breakfast recipes. The one for sweet potato pancakes has me interested so I might start there. I just know I have to do something different. So stay tuned for updates. I will definitely repost recipes that are great!
Monday, October 18, 2010
A great experience!
I apologize, I have been remiss in posting. I know, I promised an Apergillus Niger post, but I had such a great, and unique, experience this weekend that it got bumped. Sorry to those of you who were excited (mom). I promise to get it up sometime this week.
You must go eat at Ticoz. Really. It's great. I'm not kidding or exaggerating. If you happen to have food allergies, things you avoid on principal, stuff you hate, or are just generally picky, this is the place for you. Saturday night found me with two wonderful friends looking at a menu that was overwhelming. The whole experience started much as every restaurant experience starts. Greeting, seating, menus, panic attack. The server (who was lovely, but who's name I cannot remember) came by to ask what we would like. Given that all of us have some dietary challenges, we start throwing the questions at him. He doesn't know the answers, but he vows to figure it out. Usually, this does not end well, see the open letter to our sandbar server. We just get back to our conversation when chef Holly appears at our table. Everything on the menu is her brainchild and she knows exactly how to answer every one of our questions.
Not only did Chef Holly answer our questions, she created an entirely new dish for one friend (it was incredible), whipped up a lemon apricot vinaigrette salad dressing with enough for leftover containers, and took back my chicken when it came covered in parsley. All this is impressive, but what made the experience incredible was her attitude. It was obvious that she was excited about food. She saw the challenge in creating something for us. She told us that no one has ever gotten sick from her food and she was going to make sure we weren't the first.
In the end, all the service is amazing, the atmosphere is wonderful, and the staff is great. But the food is incredible!! This is pretty important, since we were there for the food. All around, this was an awesome experience. So, go to Ticoz. Chef Holly will take care of you.
You must go eat at Ticoz. Really. It's great. I'm not kidding or exaggerating. If you happen to have food allergies, things you avoid on principal, stuff you hate, or are just generally picky, this is the place for you. Saturday night found me with two wonderful friends looking at a menu that was overwhelming. The whole experience started much as every restaurant experience starts. Greeting, seating, menus, panic attack. The server (who was lovely, but who's name I cannot remember) came by to ask what we would like. Given that all of us have some dietary challenges, we start throwing the questions at him. He doesn't know the answers, but he vows to figure it out. Usually, this does not end well, see the open letter to our sandbar server. We just get back to our conversation when chef Holly appears at our table. Everything on the menu is her brainchild and she knows exactly how to answer every one of our questions.
Not only did Chef Holly answer our questions, she created an entirely new dish for one friend (it was incredible), whipped up a lemon apricot vinaigrette salad dressing with enough for leftover containers, and took back my chicken when it came covered in parsley. All this is impressive, but what made the experience incredible was her attitude. It was obvious that she was excited about food. She saw the challenge in creating something for us. She told us that no one has ever gotten sick from her food and she was going to make sure we weren't the first.
In the end, all the service is amazing, the atmosphere is wonderful, and the staff is great. But the food is incredible!! This is pretty important, since we were there for the food. All around, this was an awesome experience. So, go to Ticoz. Chef Holly will take care of you.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Casein
In addition to being allergic to lots of stuff everyone has heard of, I have the great joy of being allergic to lots of stuff people have never heard of! It's fairly easy to avoid stuff that people know about, "no cheese please!", but the other stuff is significantly more challenging.
My first step was figuring out what the heck this stuff was. I figured I might share some of this learning with you. Starting with Casein. I know, you're excited. How could you not be?
According to my internet research, casein is a milk protein. Because it clots well, it is frequently in cheese (even soy cheese, but we'll come back to that). It is also frequently used as a organic adhesive for other food products. It has been identified as the major allergenic ingredient in cow's milk.
Ok, seems straightforward enough, just avoid milk and cheese. Not so much! Because it's a great adhesive (ew), it ends up in lots of stuff. For instance, there are very few soy cheeses without casein, which I find completely unethical. You think we're buying soy cheese because it tastes so good? Of course not!!! We're avoiding milk, you jerks!! If you add casein to soy cheese we're allergic to that too! They are very sneaky about what they put casein in, so it requires careful attention.
This whole allergen thing has led to verrrrry long grocery store trips where I have to read the labels for everything!!
It's a process, but I'm chugging along.
Stay tuned for info on Aspergillus Niger, the most common part of mold!! Try not to jump out of your chair in excitement.
My first step was figuring out what the heck this stuff was. I figured I might share some of this learning with you. Starting with Casein. I know, you're excited. How could you not be?
According to my internet research, casein is a milk protein. Because it clots well, it is frequently in cheese (even soy cheese, but we'll come back to that). It is also frequently used as a organic adhesive for other food products. It has been identified as the major allergenic ingredient in cow's milk.
Ok, seems straightforward enough, just avoid milk and cheese. Not so much! Because it's a great adhesive (ew), it ends up in lots of stuff. For instance, there are very few soy cheeses without casein, which I find completely unethical. You think we're buying soy cheese because it tastes so good? Of course not!!! We're avoiding milk, you jerks!! If you add casein to soy cheese we're allergic to that too! They are very sneaky about what they put casein in, so it requires careful attention.
This whole allergen thing has led to verrrrry long grocery store trips where I have to read the labels for everything!!
It's a process, but I'm chugging along.
Stay tuned for info on Aspergillus Niger, the most common part of mold!! Try not to jump out of your chair in excitement.
Monday, September 27, 2010
Huge Progress
Yesterday I played an entire soccer game without using my inhaler. This may not sound all that exciting to you. Maybe that seems completely normal in your life. Not for me. I have never, in my adult life, been able to do something active without my inhaler. Yes, you read that right, never. Asthma has been this albatross hanging around my neck, or more accurately, with its hands around my throat, for as long as I can remember. From the first time I woke up from a dead sleep in an asthma attack, its been a huge part of my life. Its been terrifying at times, not just for me, but for those who love me. The very idea that I could play an entire 90 minute soccer game without the benefit of a vaso-dialator was inconceivable to me even 6 weeks ago. But here we are. Its happened, and it makes me believe I am on the right path. There is better life on the other side of all this food nonsense. And it is worth the effort to get there!
Sunday, September 26, 2010
An open letter to our server at the Sandbar in Scottsdle
Dear Chelsea,
"Yes" is the correct answer to the question"does your guacamole have cilantro in it?" Your answer "no it totally doesn't", along with the lighting that rendered me unable to see said guacamole, led to me waking up the next day with eyes swelled shut! Thanks for that. Also, and this is just a bonus tip, if a customer outright tells you they are allergic to cilantro, you might want to ask the kitchen not to sprinkle it over EVERYTHING ON THE PLATE! You see I, the customer, am blissfully unaware of what the kitchen uses to garnish plates. You, the server, should not be! So maybe you could hook a sister up and ask them to leave it off. I did, after all, tell you I was allergic to it less than 2 minutes ago. This might help with your tips.
With warmest regards, and no bitterness whatsoever,
Steph
"Yes" is the correct answer to the question"does your guacamole have cilantro in it?" Your answer "no it totally doesn't", along with the lighting that rendered me unable to see said guacamole, led to me waking up the next day with eyes swelled shut! Thanks for that. Also, and this is just a bonus tip, if a customer outright tells you they are allergic to cilantro, you might want to ask the kitchen not to sprinkle it over EVERYTHING ON THE PLATE! You see I, the customer, am blissfully unaware of what the kitchen uses to garnish plates. You, the server, should not be! So maybe you could hook a sister up and ask them to leave it off. I did, after all, tell you I was allergic to it less than 2 minutes ago. This might help with your tips.
With warmest regards, and no bitterness whatsoever,
Steph
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Oops!
I read labels obsessively. Almost as much as I read my textbooks. I have to know every ingredient in everything I put in my body. So imaging my surprise when I took a second look at my new favorite crackers and found that they have milk and eggs in them. Dang it!!
I wish I could say that mistake wasn't a big deal. But I woke up this morning feeling like I'd been hit by a truck. In fact, I felt hungover. Not a drop to drink and I have a hangover! Aren't I the lucky one!?! It's 5:30 the next day and it's still hanging on. All I want to do is go back to bed.
Note to self: read more carefully!!
I wish I could say that mistake wasn't a big deal. But I woke up this morning feeling like I'd been hit by a truck. In fact, I felt hungover. Not a drop to drink and I have a hangover! Aren't I the lucky one!?! It's 5:30 the next day and it's still hanging on. All I want to do is go back to bed.
Note to self: read more carefully!!
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
"this is pretty much your worst nightmare isn't it?"
That little gem was courtesy of my friend Autumn. The culprit? Potluck! A wedding reception potluck with 2 twenty foot tables loaded with all the good stuff you can imagine, and not an ingredient list in sight. Ack!! What is in that stuff??
I ended up with a plateful of roasted pig (amazing), veggies and fruits from a pre-made tray, and shrimp. From what I could tell, that was the only stuff with nothing I was allergic to. It sure made me miss the old days when I would have loaded a plate of everything I could get my hands on! It's so tough to avoid all that amazing homemade food! I did manage to resist however. If this is worth doing, it's worth doing all the way, no cheating!
Potluck is the devil!
I ended up with a plateful of roasted pig (amazing), veggies and fruits from a pre-made tray, and shrimp. From what I could tell, that was the only stuff with nothing I was allergic to. It sure made me miss the old days when I would have loaded a plate of everything I could get my hands on! It's so tough to avoid all that amazing homemade food! I did manage to resist however. If this is worth doing, it's worth doing all the way, no cheating!
Potluck is the devil!
I love my people
My trip to Nashville was awesome! It was a great blessing to be involved in my friend Shawna's wedding to Roan. Theirs is a great love, and I was thrilled to get to watch them vow to love one another forever.
My trip was made so much better by the support I found from my friends. The idea of traveling, and therefore having no control over what I ate, was fairly disconcerting to me. Luckily I have great friends. Shawna and Roan went out of their way to make sure I had what I needed. I am so grateful for their support! This journey can feel lonely, especially when you're watching everyone around you eat home churned ice cream and homemade cookies, but having the support of people I love makes it bearable. Thanks guys! you're the very best!!
Also, here are more things I'm not allergic to: the roasted pig they served at their reception, jumping from a 50 foot cliff, home grown tomatoes of every color, laughing till my sides hurt, vegan cookies and brownies (more about this in a later blog), Happy tears at seeing a great friend married, peaches from a farmer's market, making new friends, and coconut milk yogurt. (I know there are a few non-food items in there, but they deserved mentioning because they made my weekend awesome!)
My trip was made so much better by the support I found from my friends. The idea of traveling, and therefore having no control over what I ate, was fairly disconcerting to me. Luckily I have great friends. Shawna and Roan went out of their way to make sure I had what I needed. I am so grateful for their support! This journey can feel lonely, especially when you're watching everyone around you eat home churned ice cream and homemade cookies, but having the support of people I love makes it bearable. Thanks guys! you're the very best!!
Also, here are more things I'm not allergic to: the roasted pig they served at their reception, jumping from a 50 foot cliff, home grown tomatoes of every color, laughing till my sides hurt, vegan cookies and brownies (more about this in a later blog), Happy tears at seeing a great friend married, peaches from a farmer's market, making new friends, and coconut milk yogurt. (I know there are a few non-food items in there, but they deserved mentioning because they made my weekend awesome!)
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Taking this show on the road
Off I go to Nashville. If avoiding my allergens at home is troublesome, I can only imagine the adventures that await! But, other than being a hermit (not really an option), there is no choice but to venture forth. Plus, I wouldn't miss Shawna's wedding for all the tea in China!
In an effort to give myself a fighting chance, I got myself a cute little red lunchbox and packed snacks for my day of travel. No food-related airport meltdowns for me thank you very much! And, I see lots of use for this lunchbox in the future. After all, the only way to control what I have available to eat is to bring it along! Now is the moment I am thanking my mom for putting me in Girl Scouts. "Be Prepared" is going to come in handy!
In other news, the efforts to be positive have produced another thing I can have. French fries, and potato chips. I will admit that these are not even close to healthy, but anyone who knows me well will tell you they are my weakness. Yay for stuff I can eat!
In an effort to give myself a fighting chance, I got myself a cute little red lunchbox and packed snacks for my day of travel. No food-related airport meltdowns for me thank you very much! And, I see lots of use for this lunchbox in the future. After all, the only way to control what I have available to eat is to bring it along! Now is the moment I am thanking my mom for putting me in Girl Scouts. "Be Prepared" is going to come in handy!
In other news, the efforts to be positive have produced another thing I can have. French fries, and potato chips. I will admit that these are not even close to healthy, but anyone who knows me well will tell you they are my weakness. Yay for stuff I can eat!
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Success!!
I have been working very hard on focusing on what I can have. This is a major challenge, but to avoid the meltdowns, I am trying. To this end, I have been doing much brainstorming. Mexican food (minus the cheese) and asian food (minus the ginger) seem to be fairly safe options.
As I was brainstorming, a genius moment happened. YC's!! If you don't know YC's Mongolian Barbecue, you are missing out. Picture the best salad bar ever, but with stir fry. This is amazing!! I can put as much as I want of each item and ensure there is nothing in there I can't eat. It's perfect! And it can be healthy (major bonus). Dinner, leftovers, no allergens, no meldowns, and no one thinks I'm high maintenance...awesome!!
As I was brainstorming, a genius moment happened. YC's!! If you don't know YC's Mongolian Barbecue, you are missing out. Picture the best salad bar ever, but with stir fry. This is amazing!! I can put as much as I want of each item and ensure there is nothing in there I can't eat. It's perfect! And it can be healthy (major bonus). Dinner, leftovers, no allergens, no meldowns, and no one thinks I'm high maintenance...awesome!!
Monday, September 13, 2010
On eating out
I really, really hate being high maintenance. I've worked in customer service much of my life. I know what servers say about high maintenance people, I know what they do to their food. It has been my policy for years to avoid even the scent of high maintenance. And it has been a good policy for me. I will eat the wrong food before I will send it back, I will pick off the stuff I ordered it without, I will ignore the flavor of onion on my burger, I will do almost anything to be easy.
I have become "that girl". The one with the questions. The one the server hates. The one everyone at the table rolls their eyes at. It's happened and I hate it!!
You see, when most people walk into a restaurant, they get handed a menu. I get a giant book of CAN'T. Every page is chock full of wonderful things I simply cannot put in my body. This presents the first challenge.
Even if I find something that doesn't explicitly list any of my allergens...here come the questions
Did they cook those potatoes in butter?
Did they dip the chicken in egg before they breaded it?
Do the breadcrumbs have yeast?
Is parsley the herb they herbed those potatoes with?
Do you have any dairy free salad dressings?
Does that soy product have casein in it?
Does your pesto have parmesan?
No mayo, no cheese, no bun...and please no spit, I'm just trying not to make myself sick!
I have become "that girl". The one with the questions. The one the server hates. The one everyone at the table rolls their eyes at. It's happened and I hate it!!
You see, when most people walk into a restaurant, they get handed a menu. I get a giant book of CAN'T. Every page is chock full of wonderful things I simply cannot put in my body. This presents the first challenge.
Even if I find something that doesn't explicitly list any of my allergens...here come the questions
Did they cook those potatoes in butter?
Did they dip the chicken in egg before they breaded it?
Do the breadcrumbs have yeast?
Is parsley the herb they herbed those potatoes with?
Do you have any dairy free salad dressings?
Does that soy product have casein in it?
Does your pesto have parmesan?
No mayo, no cheese, no bun...and please no spit, I'm just trying not to make myself sick!
Sunday, September 12, 2010
A rough weekend
I felt pretty good for the first few days of this process. I had myself convinced that it was going to be tough, but not too tough. I could totally do it! No problem. Then I opened my refrigerator. Cheese, cheese everywhere, and yogurt, and bread, and eggs.
Cue meltdown #1, I skip dinner I just can't deal with it.
That night I have to get out of the allergen fest that is my apartment so I go out. I can't drink because pretty much every alcoholic beverage has yeast in it. I'm starving and irritable (these 2 things go hand-in-hand for me). I leave the bar and have an epiphany, a burrito! If it doesn't have cheese, I might be able to eat it. Filiberto's at 1 am. Success! I can't say it was healthy, but a carne asada burrito doesn't have any of my allergens and it felt really good to eat.
Saturday brought with it 2 more meltdowns in the form of a bridal shower (cupcakes!! I love cupcakes!) and an Applebee's menu (I stared at if for 10 minutes willing myself not to cry).
Today, lunch with friends at an old fashioned soda fountain (ice cream everywhere!) and grocery shopping (are you kidding me?!? Yeast, eggs, and dairy, how the heck do I avoid all that stuff????). Meltdowns #4 and #5 led to me curled up on my couch crying as soon as I got home.
Ok, maybe this is going to be harder than I expected. I think I might just stay in my apartment for a while, it's safe here.
Cue meltdown #1, I skip dinner I just can't deal with it.
That night I have to get out of the allergen fest that is my apartment so I go out. I can't drink because pretty much every alcoholic beverage has yeast in it. I'm starving and irritable (these 2 things go hand-in-hand for me). I leave the bar and have an epiphany, a burrito! If it doesn't have cheese, I might be able to eat it. Filiberto's at 1 am. Success! I can't say it was healthy, but a carne asada burrito doesn't have any of my allergens and it felt really good to eat.
Saturday brought with it 2 more meltdowns in the form of a bridal shower (cupcakes!! I love cupcakes!) and an Applebee's menu (I stared at if for 10 minutes willing myself not to cry).
Today, lunch with friends at an old fashioned soda fountain (ice cream everywhere!) and grocery shopping (are you kidding me?!? Yeast, eggs, and dairy, how the heck do I avoid all that stuff????). Meltdowns #4 and #5 led to me curled up on my couch crying as soon as I got home.
Ok, maybe this is going to be harder than I expected. I think I might just stay in my apartment for a while, it's safe here.
Let's start at the very beginning...
Hi!
Welcome to my journey! Since we're starting at the very beginning, here are the facts. I'm 29 and I haven't been healthy for years. I didn't really realize just how unhealthy I was till I started seeing a naturopathic doctor. Turns out, asthma shouldn't rule my life, chronic pain isn't normal, and I shouldn't be having headaches every day. I had no idea that what I eat could be the cause of all that! 1 major cleanse and 6 weeks later, I was feeling great. Then I started introducing all my old foods back into my diet and the crap hit the fan. I had gotten a food allergy panel done once the cleanse was over, but hadn't received the results yet so I felt like I was living on borrowed time. I was eating like crap and I knew it. Last week I had my first asthma attack in 6 months. It was scary and horrible and it happened on the very same day I got the results of my test. Seems like someone is trying to tell me it's time to get serious! So, I am embarking on a journey that I know will not be easy. I am doing this to be healthy and feel whole, but I know it is going to be rough going.
This blog is a chance to share my journey with you. You may have food allergies, know someone who does, or just be curious. I hope to use this forum to educate, vent, share my struggles and accomplishments, tell stories, post recipes, and anything else that might come along the way. So, here it is. Hope you enjoy.
How do I know what I'm allergic to?
I had my blood drawn for a food allergy panel. Here's how it works. They take your blood and add 110 seperate food, then they watch what your blood does. If it accepts the food as a nutrient, you're golden. If it attacks the food (which is indicated by an imuno response), you're not so golden. I have 22 food allergies. My naturopath would correct me and tell me they're "food sensitivities", but tell that to my raging asthma attack!!
What I'm allergic to:
The test splits up the allergens into 3 categories, High, Moderate, and Low. After three months of avoiding all these food, I may be able to add back in ones from the low category.
Welcome to my journey! Since we're starting at the very beginning, here are the facts. I'm 29 and I haven't been healthy for years. I didn't really realize just how unhealthy I was till I started seeing a naturopathic doctor. Turns out, asthma shouldn't rule my life, chronic pain isn't normal, and I shouldn't be having headaches every day. I had no idea that what I eat could be the cause of all that! 1 major cleanse and 6 weeks later, I was feeling great. Then I started introducing all my old foods back into my diet and the crap hit the fan. I had gotten a food allergy panel done once the cleanse was over, but hadn't received the results yet so I felt like I was living on borrowed time. I was eating like crap and I knew it. Last week I had my first asthma attack in 6 months. It was scary and horrible and it happened on the very same day I got the results of my test. Seems like someone is trying to tell me it's time to get serious! So, I am embarking on a journey that I know will not be easy. I am doing this to be healthy and feel whole, but I know it is going to be rough going.
This blog is a chance to share my journey with you. You may have food allergies, know someone who does, or just be curious. I hope to use this forum to educate, vent, share my struggles and accomplishments, tell stories, post recipes, and anything else that might come along the way. So, here it is. Hope you enjoy.
How do I know what I'm allergic to?
I had my blood drawn for a food allergy panel. Here's how it works. They take your blood and add 110 seperate food, then they watch what your blood does. If it accepts the food as a nutrient, you're golden. If it attacks the food (which is indicated by an imuno response), you're not so golden. I have 22 food allergies. My naturopath would correct me and tell me they're "food sensitivities", but tell that to my raging asthma attack!!
What I'm allergic to:
The test splits up the allergens into 3 categories, High, Moderate, and Low. After three months of avoiding all these food, I may be able to add back in ones from the low category.
High
Aspergillus Niger (the google machine tells me this stuff is often found on peanuts, grapes, and onions)
Casein
Cheese (American, Cottage)
Egg white
Parsley
Yogurt
Moderate
Baker’s yeast
Kidney beans
Cheese (mozzarella, parmesean, swiss)
Low
Brewer’s yeast
Buttermilk
Cilantro
Cow’s milk
Ginger
Kale
Lamb
Pineapple
Tuna
White Mushrooms
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